calmingthoughtsinyourhead:

I know this doesn’t fit the usual content of my blog

But this is really important to me and everybody who has to take medication.

If you are going to reblog ANYTHING from my blog, then reblog this one, okay? (You dont even have to look at my other stuff)

The #takeyourpills thing is really upsetting but maybe this is the chance to finally educate people on what my medication really does. So here it goes:

I thought I was stupid untill i was 8.

No, really, I failed all of my tests, I couldn’t pay attention in class and I had basically no social skills. I wasn’t depressed as a child but i definitely wasn’t happy. I just remember trying so hard to pay attention and do my work but I always failed and people got angry with me, saying I was lazy. That was not good for my self-esteem, I can tell you that much.

Then one day my teacher called me out in class. He had given all of us a report card and we were responsible to keep track of our test results (which apparently he couldn’t do himself but whatever). The document was very important and being the perfect chaotic mess i was (still am), i of course somehow managed to lose it.

It’s always you. This stuff always happens to you.

The whole class was staring at me when he said that. I don’t think I’ll ever really forget that moment. I had never felt so stupid in my whole life.

But i guess we have to thank that asshole because that’s when my mom and dad had me tested. Apparently I had very heavy adhd. One part of my brain develloped incredibly fast and the other part develloped very slowly, you could literally see it on my brain scan.

My psychiatrist immediately adviced my parents to send me to therapy and to get me a prescription for retaline.

My mom was totally on board with therapy but drugging me? No way.

And that’s when my psychiatrist told her:

If you had a child with only one leg, would you give them a prosthetic leg or would you let her hop after the other kids? Sure, she could perfectly make it to the finish line with just one leg, but she’s going to be exhausted once she gets there. That is of course if she doesn’t trip first.

I am not going to lie: i don’t like taking retaline. It is a horrible feeling and the side effects are just stupid. But I need that stupid thing to work like a normal functioning human being. Just the idea of taking this away from young kids ou there who feel stupid and tired makes my blood boil.

without retaline I wouldn’t have made it into college.

Without retaline I wouldn’t have finished high school.

Of course, i cannot give that drug all of the credit. It was ME who studied and worked hard to get where I am now. But without that extra legg I really am not certain whether I would have made it to the finish line.