Not requested: just with the new ego I wanted to do something
Natemare, you’d noticed, had been clingy all week. Gloomy and quiet he begged you not to look at Nate’s recent video and seemed really nervous whenever he saw you on YouTube social media anything. He had stayed home with you all week which wasn’t strange, but him not leaving your side, literally clinging like superglue onto it throughout shopping, housework the only exception being the toilet was a bit. Even when he came into the shower with you he hadn’t tried anything, no teasing nothing, his limbs seemed too tired to even wash himself and he just watched you constantly. You had a horrible feeling in your stomach that something was wrong but sometimes prying caused him to shut himself off for longer before telling you. But he hadn’t told you yet and when you woke up at 6am to see him surprisingly awake and staring at you with those big brown eyes, you had to break the silence.
“Sorry, couldn’t sleep, you were nice and warm though.” He whispered, trying to burrow himself into your chest and taking your wrist onto his hair.
You frowned and he frowned back, removing his hand. “Did I upset you?” He asked with a sleepily hoarse and timid voice. You shuffled closer so his face was at your level and not hiding in some part of you as you stroked his cheek. “Mare, what’s wrong?” He looked sleepily confused for a moment before you started to feel heat emanating from his cheeks. “Nothin’.” You sighed, thumb circling his cheekbone and he looked like he was dreading this, but it wasn’t unexpected, he bit his lip, he wanted desperately to tell you something, he had learnt he could rely on you for comfort so it wasn’t a surprise. “Did you and Nate get into a fight?” You tried but he shook his head, looping his leg around your lower body. “No… was annoyed at him for a little bit, but that’s not why…” he stopped himself, nuzzling under your chin and whining “Can we just never talk about this?”
“No.” you said firmly but your gentle hand filing through the egos hair calmed him “You know you can tell me anything. And I know you’re upset about something. It hurts me to see you like this and we’re not avoiding it any longer.” You kissed his hair and he looked up at you, peeking an eye open and groaning because he knew he couldn’t hold back. “I love you, Mare.” He looked up at you properly, moving to kiss your forehead as he held you closely against him, almost crushing you protectively against his chest.
You waited a few minutes, closing your eyes as his grip never loosened, only squeezing you tighter at points, before he finally got up, grabbing his phone for you. You sat up next to him as you saw him quickly get onto YouTube so you couldn’t see the many text notifications he’d been missing or more likely avoiding as he brought up the video you’d heard him crying at night about. He didn’t watch it. Just rested his chin on your shoulder, kissing the side of your face occasionally as he traced it, these past few days you’d caught him staring at you like it was the last time.
When the video had finished, neither one of you interrupting during it, you gave his phone back and cuddled into him more, he looked slightly shocked. “Well… what did you think?” He held your hand tightly as you looked at him gently. “I always like Nate’s songs.” He pouted “And I prefer yourssss.” You promised, kissing his cheek over and over and he exhaled in a laugh as you did before gently pushing you off. “But about…” he rolled his eyes as he spoke “Phantom? Did you… like him?” You turned and sat cross legged facing him as you held his hands in your lap. “Natemare what’s going on?”
Natemare ground his teeth bitterly as he looked away, not bearing to watch as he confided in you. He sighed, playing with your hands with some built up emotions, tapping them like a piano.
“We have a new ego.”
Your breath caught in your throat as your eyebrows furrowed.
“…I’m not the only one of his now…”
You scooted onto his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck as he did your waist. “W-What if there’s a dozen of us? I’m not going to be anyone’s favourite! Everyone’s already calling him a ‘Natemare upgrade’ or going ‘Hey! Guess who’s FINALLY got an ego?!’” He sniffed, collecting himself as you rested on his shoulder, he pulled back to look at you, wanting to see you for this and your heart shattered with the black tear stain that rolled down his cheek. “What if you leave me for the upgrade?” You gasped in shock and flung your arms tightly around him once more as he angrily tried to stop himself from crying, holding your face in his hands so he could nuzzle it and calm himself, stroking through your hair as he looked at you with that same stare, like he was soon about to lose you.
You grabbed his face in your hands too as you felt tears burning in your eyes. “Natemare.” He stilled his movements, breathing quieter as he tensely watched your lips move with the words you spoke. “I’m not leaving you. No one can force me to do that. I love you, and I don’t think you need an upgrade nor do you have one. I love YOU, not him, and no videos or comments, or even if there’s a hundred people with your face and voice, are changing that.” He let out shaky breaths, stroking down your face with shaking hands. “Mare I love you so much.” He nodded, kissing your lips quickly but sweetly as he smiled for the first time that week. “I love you too y/n. More than anything.” You pecked his lips once more and he happily accepted that, looking at you and you could see the cheekiness behind those blackening eyes through his tears as he softly gripped the back of your neck and pulled you in to a deeper, needier kiss. Not letting your lips leave his for a moment as his hot breath fanned over you, quickly changing up his movements as you laughed into his kiss and he laughed right back, pulling back at the tail end of it to let you breathe but his lips still touched yours
“He’s not taking you from me. I need you so so much.” He whined, kissing again before you pulled your lips apart and he opened his eyes, which were fully black now and not because of tears but something else. “And why would that happen?” You asked, pecking his lips once more to not throw off the mood. “Well, we both know you’re very attractive.” You opened your mouth to say something but his impatient tongue was enough to lower you to a laying position and forget about the last week by making it up with even more special Natemare time.
Greetings! The name is Time Lizzy, or Time as my friends call me. They/Them pronouns. I love to try new things, draw, sing, dance, garden, and I do some witchcraft in my free time. I'm a Hetalia role playing partner if you guys are interested.
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Think Things 