Bim: woahwoahwoah, let me get this straight, you and Dark have been together for almost 4 years?
Wilford: bim, there’s nothing straight about it.
Author: Time Lizzy Saint
Wilford: Making my way downtown, walking fast~
Wilford: … *looks behind him for Dark*
Wilford: Walking slower to walk with Dark, cause Dark is short~!
Dark: Excuse me?!
Wilford: If I was the last man alive, would you date me?
Dark: If you were the last man on Earth, I wouldn’t exist.
Wilford: …Fuck, you’re right.
Google: You know, your creators made some really good jokes.
Bing: Yeah, really? Like what?
Google: Well, they made you.
Bing: …noW THAT’S UNCALLED FOR!
Wilford: You look really good today!
Dark: Thank you!
Wilford: (º_º )
Dark: …
Wilford: (º_º )
Dark: *sigh* You too…
Wilford: (º◡º✿)
Marks and Rec: Misc #1049
(It was an accident, I swear.) (Dialogue from Orange is the New Black.)
Darkiplier: whose idea was it for you three to get drunk and then let Host dive naked into the river?
Bingiplier: i didn’t tell him to take off his clothes and jump in the river.
Bim: that’s exactly what you did! you literally said, “Host, i dare you to go skinny dipping in the river.”
The Host, drunk and dripping wet: [wrapped in his coat] it doesn’t matter, i’m fine now–
Bim: don’t you understand?! by flinging your naked self into the nearest body of water you’ve compromised the integrity of our entire group, and doomed Markiplier TV’s image until the end of time!
Darkiplier, pointing at Bim: you, lighten up.
Darkiplier, pointing at Bingiplier: you, big trouble.
Darkiplier, pointing at Host: you, get in the car.
Wilford: Hey Dark! If you ever get married, can I have an important part in it?
Dark: I don’t know Wil, may-
Wilford: Like being the groom?
Dark: …
Dark: Oh god, that was so smooth.
Wilford: I know right?! 😀
Dark: And this is my ex-boyfriend, Wilford.
Wilford: You’ve got to stop introducing me like that!
Wilford: I’m his husband.
Wilford: Are you a cuddler?
Dark: I AM A BEING MADE OF SPITE AND ANGER, DRIVEN ONLY BY REVENGE.
Wilford: So?
Dark: …yeah, I’m a cuddler.